Hands moved over my body in that terrible hellish place, the noose that the huge balor had passed around my neck had been drawn tight and I was being drug throughout this immense cavern like I was on display for all to see. The cackles and whoops from the many deformed figures around me reminded me of monkeys at the zoo, the way they laughed at you and pointed like they secretly knew all life’s secrets, but would forever keep them to themselves.
My eyes moved back to the boy/demon sitting on the throne of ivory or fire, the two kept changing so rapidly that I could not differentiate between which was real….or were they both real? The beautiful mouth smiled like the Cheshire cat in Alice in Wonderland, yet the demonish snout curled into a smile, one that mimicked a lion before the feeding.
His eyes never changed, they were the one constant that helped me focus to realize that both images were the truth. My heart was deafening, its pounding seemed to create a cadence that the demons flowed to, dragging me in rapid pulls, ever closer to the monstrosity that sat atop the dais at the end of the cavern.
Fire seemed to free float in this place, and magma was in deep pits everywhere, but here in this place I could not tell if they were real or my imagination, so many things seemed to be from my fantasized view of hell and I began to wonder if the demons were reading my mind.
At this realization, the noose around my neck was thrust forward by the largest of the balors. He was a deep crimson and ebon skinned monstrosity. He was easily 9 feet tall, heavy set chest, bulging arms, with scales running the lengths, above his neck sat an evil simian face, one the mocked humanity, and yet emanated intelligence. His eyes were not the passionless of my killer, but were pitch black, and I knew that this creature was pure unadulterated evil!
Of all the things I had seen here this creature was the first to cause my bowels to revolt, I felt the warmth of urine flowing down my leg, for the 1st time in my life or afterlife, I knew what fear was, and I knew I didn’t want this thing to speak.
His ape like face seemed to snicker as if evil could find humor in anything. His mouth never opened, but I still heard it invading my mind, forcing its way in.
The voice that spoke in my head was nightmarish, it rasped, guttural noises that I could barely distinguish as syllables, that turned into words as if being instantly translated by some greater consciousness. “Youuu haavvveee beeennnn jjjjuudgged! I aaammm iiinnn ccchhhhaaarrrgggee oooffff yyyyooouuuurrrrr tttrrraaaannnnsssssfffoooorrrrmmmaattiiiooonnn. Nnnoooowwwww kkknnnnneeeellll bbbeeefffooorrreeee yyyyyoooouuuurrrr ttttrrruuueeee goooooddddd”!
Hearing this guttural voice speak with such fluidity and intelligence put me in a state of shock, and my legs were being compelled to bend into a kneel, and looking at the beautiful regal man before me I wanted to. Then the transformation took hold and it wasn’t the man but the monster and my half bent knees straightened knowing that if the simian creature was evil, this thing on the throne was the epitome of sin, and all that is wrong with everything.
“Knnneeeelllll”! Waves of white hot heat flowed over my body in shockwaves, my skin blistered and popped, forcing me to scream for the 1st time since my wings had been destroyed. I felt my eyes begin to melt again, and could feel the skin all over begin to drip like wax from a too long lit candle. The pain was immense and without thinking of the repercussions I knelt, immediately feeling the pain subside. The itching sensation of healing began, and when the roars begin I knew I had made the wrong decision.
The immensely evil balor picked me up throwing me over his shoulder, his hands burned deep into my skin, and from his shoulder I could smell the breath that reminded me of ash and hot coals. He was not gentle with the way he carried me, banging me into walls, and hitting my head on underpasses that moved to accommodate his enormous girth, then suddenly snapped back into place jolting me in the upraised head.
We twisted and turned and everywhere I looked it was as if hell was on vacation, all the inhabitants were standing on the two sides of this cavernous road we were traveling on, it was like some kind of macabre parade, but we were the only exhibit.
Strangely I realized that escape had never crossed into my mind and I knew that the thing carrying me had read this thought, this time there was no mistaking it, he outright laughed. If wheezing billowy eruptions from an apelike creature that stood 9 feet tall could be called laughter.
“Where are we going? I dared to speak, what is it that you are going to do with me”?
My jailor responded again without speaking, but his voice vocalized inside of my head, “Too bbee ttrraannssffoorrmmed”.
Another queer thing, this things speaking seemed to be improving.
“Transformed? Into what”? No answer went off in my head. “Answer me you son of a bitch”!
With that he slammed me into the ground, I felt my spine shatter, skull fracture, and many other bones in my physiology I couldn’t identify break. His maw moved to within inches of my face, and he spoke, it was the same voice, guttural and disturbing, only it seemed that much more human, “Never speaaakk ooff ttthhinngss you kkknnnoooww noootthhhiing aaabbout. Tthis iiisss yyoouur fffiinnal wwaarning”!
Groaning on the ground, he moved his hand into his pocket and pulled out a rod, one with angels wings on it, much like the ones they had removed and cauterized from my body. He waved it over my broken body and immediately I felt tissue and bone mend and heal, moments later it was if nothing had even happened to me.
“What the hell”? Questioningly and cautiously I looked up at the demon that had destroyed my body then somehow healed it.
The voice vocalizing in my head again, “Nnoot heellll, iii toookkkk ttthhhhaaattt ooooffff ttthhheee llllaassssttt aaannnggeeelll I killleeeddd”! The pleasure I heard in my head, made me unsteady, and with all that I had been through I swayed on my feet for a few seconds and passed out.
Awakening in and out of consciousness, the halls seemed to be growing darker and the only light source was free floating fire every 15 yards or so. The heat in this hallway was immense, and it forced my eyes to squint. Looking up I saw that my transportation was smiling a toothy grin and I found myself believing we were headed towards this denizens abyssal home.
Once again he could read every thought that I had, “YYeesss I llivvveee heerrreee…..bbbuuutttt wwweeee aaarrreee gggoooinnnggg tttooo aannoootthheerrr ppplllaaacccee…a pplllaaccceee oooffff ccchhhaaannnngggeee”.
How accustomed I had become to a voice speaking in my head, yet it felt as if I was constantly being raped, and assaulted mentally in this place, I could feel the residue of his evil probing on my brain. It was like muddy water being in your mouth, the water was clearly there, but you could still feel the dirty texture of objects floating inside.
A large oval shaped steel door appeared ahead, its onyx coloration gave it a shape shifting appearance from the flickering of the floating fire; However the closer I got to the door, the more it seemed to actually be moving, there was strangely no handle to push on, nor did there seem to be any type of a lock.
The demon gently lowered me to the ground and placed both his hands against the door, the warmth from his hands seemed to soak into what 1st had appeared to be steel, was a dark oak. His fiery hands seemed to heat the door and the dark coloration begins to glow. When enough heat had been absorbed eyes shot open from inside of the door, they were cold calculating eyes and glowed with an orange hue, one that bordered on the sun’s radiance. Then a mouth appeared. It spoke with a wizened accent, one learned over an ancient amount of time. “Is it time again? It has only been a few centuries”.
My demon captor looked at the eyes and spoke to him, although nothing was said out loud, it was certain there was a confrontational battle of wills, and it seemed that my captor was not all powerful as I had come to believe. Sweat flowed down his muscular body, his muscles twitched with strain, and his eyes were straining to maintain locked visage with the door.
“You will upset the balance! The door screamed, it is too soon, think of what you are doing (demons name) even your evil soul knows this is not right”. The strain in the voice was that of one about to be defeated who was changing tactics to begging.
(demons name) I had heard that somewhere before, I knew him somehow, we had a past, but my memories were in heaven where I had left them. Left them when I was stripped of all that made me human, when I was being accepted into heaven. I knew then that I was not allowed in because of the hate and the evil feeling I had brought with me. By fighting to hold onto those shark eyes that murdered me I had damned myself.
(demons name) said aloud with perfect clarity, “It’s not my decision, it is my masters bidding, and you know (doors name) that not even I can ignore those orders”.
His accent was surely (Islamic, Persian, or Egyptian whichever character I choose from the bible), I have never heard either, but instinct told me I was right. Something about the confidence in his voice made me feel like he was someone important from his time, and I knew he definitely was ancient. For the 1st time I noticed that he was not speaking English, nor was the door, the dialect and language was something I didn’t understand, yet I could speak it fluently and understand it as well.
(demons name) pushed his hands against the door, fire leapt from his hands, it was wrapped all about him, then it shot into the door, I could hear the door screaming and knew that it was being forced open. I knew all of this had something consequentially bad to do with me and I jumped up from my seated position and ran!
Pumping my legs and arms I began to run as hard and as fast as I could, only the hallway in which I was running like so many other things in this place seemed to come alive, it elongated, preventing me from ever really getting anywhere. My mind erupted into panic, the noose was still hanging from my neck and the rope was still dangling back where I had started…..
The pain was only for an instant, the rope was pulled tight, and my neck was snapped into two. The feeling in my legs and arms was gone and I knew I had been paralyzed. I heard a thump as disorientation took hold and I knew the thump had been me hitting the ground. My face was buried in the chilly heat of the cobblestone floor; even the floors in this god forsaken place were hot enough to burn your face.
I did feel the hand close around the back of my neck, it wrapped easily all the way around and my eyes registered the rise in the air as (demons name) picked me up and slung me roughly over his shoulder again.
A mental barrage assaulted my being, and even though I couldn’t feel my body, pain erupted inside of my brain; my screams tore throughout the hallway and my eyes saw that we had passed beyond the door that (demons name) had battled earlier.
I could already feel my body healing, although it would take some time without the healing powers from the wondrous rod at my demon jailors belt.
His mouth curled into another hideous smile, I knew he was reading my mind again. We both knew he didn’t have to tell me that he had no intentions of healing me again. He bellowed with that awful laughter at this thought, and gave me a mental image of an altar, with demons all around it, and I was tied to it. All sorts of creatures were closing in around me and no matter what I did I couldn’t escape. Somewhere in the crowd the beautiful man was laughing, only it kept getting closer and closer until he was on me, hands caressing my face telling me he loves me and that I was his chosen one.
Fear sent waves throughout my body and I realized that I could feel my toes numb, but I could feel them. I looked up at (demons name) and tried to peer through to see his real image, the one that was hidden, or the one that was real, I hadn’t decided yet. All I saw in return was a aura of blackness that seemed to shield him from my strange talent. Again he laughed, knowing that my feeble attempts at rebellion were futile. For the 1st time since I arrived in this hell, I too felt like all that I did or could do was futile. My will was broken and the worst was still to come.
At this thought (demons name) spoke again out loud, “Yyyessss ttthhheee wooorrrssstt isss sttillll aahheeaaddd”. His voice and statement sent a shiver down my now mending spine, and for a moment I wished that it would have just stayed broken. With this thought (demons name) erupted with laughter, and once again began our walk to where I knew my fate was going to be decided.
.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Ceremony
The vision passed over me, still that incarnation of evil and his laughter would not leave my mind. (Demons name) looked down at me with a knowing gaze, one that spoke of experience with this particular subject, knowledge of what I was thinking and the futility that resided in my heart.
God had rejected me, earth had given me up, and it seemed hell was the only place that wanted me.
Pain no longer seemed to affect my being, it was as if I had acclimated to it, the way someone acclimates to climate, or heat, or cold. This cleared my mind and allowed me time to see exactly where I was and exactly what was going on.
I was in a circular room; there were lines of white above me, deeply traced into the pinnacle of this immense cavern. They formed a circular shape, one that seemed to create a place where a door or portal should have been, but no longer seemed to be open. This I knew was where I had fallen through, yet somehow I had ended up somewhere else in this hell, this place of pain, and suffering. This place that had the smell of a hospital, and a tomb, the stench of rotting flesh invaded my nose, and the feeling of death crept into my being. This feeling made a chill shoot down my spine, and my heart to race, my vision blurred, and I turned my head in time to see that all of hells creatures were staring at me.
Sitting atop his throne, one that seemed to follow him wherever he went, the beautiful man cast his regal stare on me and I knew that my time had come. Whatever they had planned on from the beginning it was about to culminate to fruition.
He smiled knowing my every thought, and with that I visualized the hand I had seen in heaven. The beautiful majestic hand that had reached out to me to deliver me from all of life’s sins, that hand had promised nothing but good things, and yet I could not release the hate I felt for that man that had murdered me. I concentrated on that hand and the whiteness around it and for the moment, the demons and their masters seemed to melt away, leaving me in tranquility.
Peace passed through my body and mind, I felt all of my injured body heal, and then the monstrous fist of (demons name) smashed in between my shoulder blades. It seemed to explode on impact and I thought my body had been split apart. Yet the hand I was visualizing seemed to absorb the pain and even though the shock of the blow made me lose my concentration and I was catapulted back into the hell I had momentarily escaped, I knew I was not damned.
Hands grabbed at me from all directions, I stared at the beautiful man and his evil eyes, and smiling I accepted whatever fate my true God had set forth for me.
The smile of the beautiful man turned into an inhuman snarl, and his transformation took place not within a blink, but before my very eyes, even the thought of the hand could not block all the fear that came into me. The body of the beautiful man just exploded, blood and gore went everywhere and emerging from within the shell that once had the look of a man was the monster, its twenty foot frame dominated the room and his evil hands waved forth his minions and he spoke, “Begin the ceremony, (demons name) the time has come, and the portal will soon open.”
(Demons name) turned and looked into me, he had a pious aura about him, and one that promised to deliver what had been asked of him.
Quicker then I imagined something of his size and girth could move, he produced the reverse looking cross from out of nowhere and his bulging muscles sent it down towards my midsection. A piercing feeling erupted into my stomach and the flow of blood was partially stemmed from the huge object that was protruding out of me. The end of the cross that had just passed through my stomach, struck the ground with a crash, and I found myself pinned, a crack began to open a hole through which an altar moved upwards. It was the altar from my premonition, and I knew that all that I had imagined was going to come to pass.
Screeches and roars, cheers, and hoops, all manner of noises animal, guttural and unimaginable roared to life. I felt like I was in some sort of macabre zoo, the noises were matched by creatures straight out of a nightmare. Large and small, doglike, apelike, serpent like, they each emanated evil, and each had their devilish eyes trained on me.
Looking around the room some more, I viewed the great spectacle of (demons name) doing what could only be described as performing the ceremony. He had stripped all of his armor, and items on his belt. He stood impressively naked, corded muscles flexing with strain, his apelike face looking extremely more human. He had a dark aura floating about his body; it made him hard to see, yet outlined him in a way that made him look as if he was in this crowded room all alone.
From above us, the white lines begin to swirl, and become a corporeal gate, one that looked like a maelstrom in the middle of the ocean.
Somehow I knew that, that gate was the way out of this hellish place. My hand raised in the air, reaching for something that was impossibly out of my reach. If only…..
(Demons name) reached out and touched the upside down cross that was impaling my stomach, more pain erupted in my stomach and I knew that this wound was not healing. That familiar itch was not present, and I knew that for the first time, I could be completely destroyed.
Holding tightly to the cross (demons name) used both hands to steady himself; I could tell through gritted teeth that this was putting great strain on him. His stomach opened up with a grotesque wound, one that resembled the one I knew was in my own stomach. I could feel superhuman strength flowing into me, and I realized that we were sharing each other’s energies. This cross was transmitting part of each of us back and forth, it felt like I was being ripped into pieces then formed back together again all at the same time. I could not stand it, my mind began to rip, I knew that much more of this would result in my insanity. My God! I thought to myself, this apelike creature was doing this same thing to himself, his piety for his false god must be immense.
Clarity was restored to me, and I saw (demons name) collapse onto the floor, I felt my hands wrap about the impaled cross and yank it out of the ground and out of my stomach. The wound immediately closed the blood flowed back inside, and no trace that I had ever been wounded could be detected. I looked around first checking to see that (demons name) had not recovered yet from his weakened condition. Then I looked to the portal, its swirling was slowing, and I knew my time was short. This was my one and only chance to escape this place and I knew somehow that I had the newfound abilities to escape.
My muscles felt more corded then they had been in life, I felt as if I had grown and somehow the ceiling seemed that much closer to me. Fear hit me in waves, and I knew I was being compelled to kneel. This could only mean one thing, the monster/beautiful man was looking at me. My extra sensory reflexes seemed honed to a fine edge, and from the feel of the stare I knew exactly where the beautiful man was. I wheeled on my pivot foot, turning my hips and conjuring my ancient ancestors I threw the cross like a javelin at the monster that had once been the beautiful man. From the moment it left my hands I knew that it was going to strike true. My mouth curled into a smile that was defeated as my projectile weapon was turned aside by some sort of shield that I could just make out in an outline of lavender.
Something inside of me told me to run, yet I felt like I should kneel before the power that was this thing. Deliberating this, a huge familiar apelike creature crashed into me, knocking the air from my lungs, I instinctually wrapped my hands around (demons name) hips and threw him as hard as I could. Not really expecting anything, I felt him fly over my head and heard him crash into the wall behind me.
Stunned, I knew the other demons in this pit of hell would be on me in moments. And I knew that somehow I had to get through the dissipating portal above me. Concentrating somehow I knew that I could make it. Running, I leaped into the wall, using my newfound strength I pressed my feet down hard as I could into the cavernous wall and leaped again. Even with the two massive leaps I knew I was going to come up short, but the maelstrom seemed to be creating suction, and I became caught in it. It pulled me upwards and I knew that I was going to escape.
Hell had never heard joyful laughter before. It had heard cruel laughter, and revengeful laughter, but hell had never heard the laugh of a child, or the laugh of a loving family. For a brief moment the flames seemed a little less hot, the air seemed a little sweeter, and hell was for that brief moment in time a place filled with hope. This moment passed like so many others throughout history as a single human man escaped from the place that was inescapable. This event would not be remembered or spoken of as (demons name) and the beautiful man systematically destroyed all of the lesser demons that had seen these events unfold. Yet just for that brief time, good had triumphed in a place that evil ruled completely.
The maelstrom felt like water, but I could not be certain that it was not just my imagination. So many things in this place seemed to be created from my mind, and not real. The water passed over my over heated body, and steam began to rise all around me, creating a grayish fog that blocked my view.
Gone was the sound of the screeching demons, gone was the telepathic roars that were constantly in my mind, gone were the rapists who took all my thoughts and used them against me. The silence reminded me of the time when I was floating in the white, and the feeling that I was being transported from one place to another hit me stronger than either of the past times.
The reality that I was actually escaping took hold, and I began to question my escape, was it really happening or just an illusion created in my mind by (demons name). He had done similar feats to me before, and letting me believe I was escaping definitely would be the cruelest thing that he could possibly do to me.
The fog started to disappear and the steam against my eyes made it difficult to see, but I thought I felt something warm in a pleasant way passing through. My feet hit something substantial, and I knew my transport had come to an end. Whether I had actually escaped from one hell, and ended up in another was being blocked by the fog of the steam from my body and the maelstrom.
A sound broke through the barrier that was the grayness, it was a chirping sound that resembled that of one of the demons, and the feeling of hopelessness returned. My shoulders slumped and I believed that my earlier worries of being teased by (demons name) were coming true.
Then the sound seemed to force the grayness away, and sunlight shone through, hitting my face causing my sensitive eyes to close, and immediately I could feel the life force that had caused the chirping sound. It was a few hundred feet away now, flapping its small wings and gaining altitude. Standing there squinting my eyes into the setting sun watching the bird fly, I was reminded of my wings, and the angel I should have become. And I finally knew I had escaped, for no demon could have created something of this magnificent beauty. No demon no matter the greatness could ever imagine a sight of this purity. The way the slight breeze was blowing the great trees and the greenness of the grass that seemed to go on and on as far as I could see. With this realization, I knew I was back on earth.
The tree I had appeared underneath cast a slight shade on my body, and with escape becoming a reality, all that I had been through assaulted me at once. The torture, the pain, the loss of grace, the eyes of a killer, it all came tumbling down and coupled with exhaustion I felt myself become weightless. I struck the ground, and blackness overtook me.
God had rejected me, earth had given me up, and it seemed hell was the only place that wanted me.
Pain no longer seemed to affect my being, it was as if I had acclimated to it, the way someone acclimates to climate, or heat, or cold. This cleared my mind and allowed me time to see exactly where I was and exactly what was going on.
I was in a circular room; there were lines of white above me, deeply traced into the pinnacle of this immense cavern. They formed a circular shape, one that seemed to create a place where a door or portal should have been, but no longer seemed to be open. This I knew was where I had fallen through, yet somehow I had ended up somewhere else in this hell, this place of pain, and suffering. This place that had the smell of a hospital, and a tomb, the stench of rotting flesh invaded my nose, and the feeling of death crept into my being. This feeling made a chill shoot down my spine, and my heart to race, my vision blurred, and I turned my head in time to see that all of hells creatures were staring at me.
Sitting atop his throne, one that seemed to follow him wherever he went, the beautiful man cast his regal stare on me and I knew that my time had come. Whatever they had planned on from the beginning it was about to culminate to fruition.
He smiled knowing my every thought, and with that I visualized the hand I had seen in heaven. The beautiful majestic hand that had reached out to me to deliver me from all of life’s sins, that hand had promised nothing but good things, and yet I could not release the hate I felt for that man that had murdered me. I concentrated on that hand and the whiteness around it and for the moment, the demons and their masters seemed to melt away, leaving me in tranquility.
Peace passed through my body and mind, I felt all of my injured body heal, and then the monstrous fist of (demons name) smashed in between my shoulder blades. It seemed to explode on impact and I thought my body had been split apart. Yet the hand I was visualizing seemed to absorb the pain and even though the shock of the blow made me lose my concentration and I was catapulted back into the hell I had momentarily escaped, I knew I was not damned.
Hands grabbed at me from all directions, I stared at the beautiful man and his evil eyes, and smiling I accepted whatever fate my true God had set forth for me.
The smile of the beautiful man turned into an inhuman snarl, and his transformation took place not within a blink, but before my very eyes, even the thought of the hand could not block all the fear that came into me. The body of the beautiful man just exploded, blood and gore went everywhere and emerging from within the shell that once had the look of a man was the monster, its twenty foot frame dominated the room and his evil hands waved forth his minions and he spoke, “Begin the ceremony, (demons name) the time has come, and the portal will soon open.”
(Demons name) turned and looked into me, he had a pious aura about him, and one that promised to deliver what had been asked of him.
Quicker then I imagined something of his size and girth could move, he produced the reverse looking cross from out of nowhere and his bulging muscles sent it down towards my midsection. A piercing feeling erupted into my stomach and the flow of blood was partially stemmed from the huge object that was protruding out of me. The end of the cross that had just passed through my stomach, struck the ground with a crash, and I found myself pinned, a crack began to open a hole through which an altar moved upwards. It was the altar from my premonition, and I knew that all that I had imagined was going to come to pass.
Screeches and roars, cheers, and hoops, all manner of noises animal, guttural and unimaginable roared to life. I felt like I was in some sort of macabre zoo, the noises were matched by creatures straight out of a nightmare. Large and small, doglike, apelike, serpent like, they each emanated evil, and each had their devilish eyes trained on me.
Looking around the room some more, I viewed the great spectacle of (demons name) doing what could only be described as performing the ceremony. He had stripped all of his armor, and items on his belt. He stood impressively naked, corded muscles flexing with strain, his apelike face looking extremely more human. He had a dark aura floating about his body; it made him hard to see, yet outlined him in a way that made him look as if he was in this crowded room all alone.
From above us, the white lines begin to swirl, and become a corporeal gate, one that looked like a maelstrom in the middle of the ocean.
Somehow I knew that, that gate was the way out of this hellish place. My hand raised in the air, reaching for something that was impossibly out of my reach. If only…..
(Demons name) reached out and touched the upside down cross that was impaling my stomach, more pain erupted in my stomach and I knew that this wound was not healing. That familiar itch was not present, and I knew that for the first time, I could be completely destroyed.
Holding tightly to the cross (demons name) used both hands to steady himself; I could tell through gritted teeth that this was putting great strain on him. His stomach opened up with a grotesque wound, one that resembled the one I knew was in my own stomach. I could feel superhuman strength flowing into me, and I realized that we were sharing each other’s energies. This cross was transmitting part of each of us back and forth, it felt like I was being ripped into pieces then formed back together again all at the same time. I could not stand it, my mind began to rip, I knew that much more of this would result in my insanity. My God! I thought to myself, this apelike creature was doing this same thing to himself, his piety for his false god must be immense.
Clarity was restored to me, and I saw (demons name) collapse onto the floor, I felt my hands wrap about the impaled cross and yank it out of the ground and out of my stomach. The wound immediately closed the blood flowed back inside, and no trace that I had ever been wounded could be detected. I looked around first checking to see that (demons name) had not recovered yet from his weakened condition. Then I looked to the portal, its swirling was slowing, and I knew my time was short. This was my one and only chance to escape this place and I knew somehow that I had the newfound abilities to escape.
My muscles felt more corded then they had been in life, I felt as if I had grown and somehow the ceiling seemed that much closer to me. Fear hit me in waves, and I knew I was being compelled to kneel. This could only mean one thing, the monster/beautiful man was looking at me. My extra sensory reflexes seemed honed to a fine edge, and from the feel of the stare I knew exactly where the beautiful man was. I wheeled on my pivot foot, turning my hips and conjuring my ancient ancestors I threw the cross like a javelin at the monster that had once been the beautiful man. From the moment it left my hands I knew that it was going to strike true. My mouth curled into a smile that was defeated as my projectile weapon was turned aside by some sort of shield that I could just make out in an outline of lavender.
Something inside of me told me to run, yet I felt like I should kneel before the power that was this thing. Deliberating this, a huge familiar apelike creature crashed into me, knocking the air from my lungs, I instinctually wrapped my hands around (demons name) hips and threw him as hard as I could. Not really expecting anything, I felt him fly over my head and heard him crash into the wall behind me.
Stunned, I knew the other demons in this pit of hell would be on me in moments. And I knew that somehow I had to get through the dissipating portal above me. Concentrating somehow I knew that I could make it. Running, I leaped into the wall, using my newfound strength I pressed my feet down hard as I could into the cavernous wall and leaped again. Even with the two massive leaps I knew I was going to come up short, but the maelstrom seemed to be creating suction, and I became caught in it. It pulled me upwards and I knew that I was going to escape.
Hell had never heard joyful laughter before. It had heard cruel laughter, and revengeful laughter, but hell had never heard the laugh of a child, or the laugh of a loving family. For a brief moment the flames seemed a little less hot, the air seemed a little sweeter, and hell was for that brief moment in time a place filled with hope. This moment passed like so many others throughout history as a single human man escaped from the place that was inescapable. This event would not be remembered or spoken of as (demons name) and the beautiful man systematically destroyed all of the lesser demons that had seen these events unfold. Yet just for that brief time, good had triumphed in a place that evil ruled completely.
The maelstrom felt like water, but I could not be certain that it was not just my imagination. So many things in this place seemed to be created from my mind, and not real. The water passed over my over heated body, and steam began to rise all around me, creating a grayish fog that blocked my view.
Gone was the sound of the screeching demons, gone was the telepathic roars that were constantly in my mind, gone were the rapists who took all my thoughts and used them against me. The silence reminded me of the time when I was floating in the white, and the feeling that I was being transported from one place to another hit me stronger than either of the past times.
The reality that I was actually escaping took hold, and I began to question my escape, was it really happening or just an illusion created in my mind by (demons name). He had done similar feats to me before, and letting me believe I was escaping definitely would be the cruelest thing that he could possibly do to me.
The fog started to disappear and the steam against my eyes made it difficult to see, but I thought I felt something warm in a pleasant way passing through. My feet hit something substantial, and I knew my transport had come to an end. Whether I had actually escaped from one hell, and ended up in another was being blocked by the fog of the steam from my body and the maelstrom.
A sound broke through the barrier that was the grayness, it was a chirping sound that resembled that of one of the demons, and the feeling of hopelessness returned. My shoulders slumped and I believed that my earlier worries of being teased by (demons name) were coming true.
Then the sound seemed to force the grayness away, and sunlight shone through, hitting my face causing my sensitive eyes to close, and immediately I could feel the life force that had caused the chirping sound. It was a few hundred feet away now, flapping its small wings and gaining altitude. Standing there squinting my eyes into the setting sun watching the bird fly, I was reminded of my wings, and the angel I should have become. And I finally knew I had escaped, for no demon could have created something of this magnificent beauty. No demon no matter the greatness could ever imagine a sight of this purity. The way the slight breeze was blowing the great trees and the greenness of the grass that seemed to go on and on as far as I could see. With this realization, I knew I was back on earth.
The tree I had appeared underneath cast a slight shade on my body, and with escape becoming a reality, all that I had been through assaulted me at once. The torture, the pain, the loss of grace, the eyes of a killer, it all came tumbling down and coupled with exhaustion I felt myself become weightless. I struck the ground, and blackness overtook me.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Prisoner
Hands moved over my body in that terrible hellish place, the noose that the huge balor had passed around my neck had been drawn tight and I was being drug throughout this immense cavern like I was on display for all to see. The cackles and whoops from the many deformed figures around me reminded me of monkeys at the zoo, the way they laughed at you and pointed like they secretly knew all life’s secrets, but would forever keep them to themselves.
My eyes moved back to the boy/demon sitting on the throne of ivory or fire, the two kept changing so rapidly that I could not differentiate between which was real….or were they both real? The beautiful mouth smiled like the Cheshire cat in Alice in Wonderland, yet the demonish snout curled into a smile, one that mimicked a lion before the feeding.
His eyes never changed, they were the one constant that helped me focus to realize that both images were the truth. My heart was deafening, its pounding seemed to create a cadence that the demons flowed to, dragging me in rapid pulls, ever closer to the monstrosity that sat atop the dais at the end of the cavern.
Fire seemed to free float in this place, and magma was in deep pits everywhere, but here in this place I could not tell if they were real or my imagination, so many things seemed to be from my fantasized view of hell and I began to wonder if the demons were reading my mind.
At this realization, the noose around my neck was thrust forward by the largest of the balors. He was a deep crimson and ebon skinned monstrosity. He was easily 9 feet tall, heavy set chest, bulging arms, with scales running the lengths, above his neck sat an evil simian face, one the mocked humanity, and yet emanated intelligence. His eyes were not the passionless of my killer, but were pitch black, and I knew that this creature was pure unadulterated evil!
Of all the things I had seen here this creature was the first to cause my bowels to revolt, I felt the warmth of urine flowing down my leg, for the 1st time in my life or afterlife, I knew what fear was, and I knew I didn’t want this thing to speak.
His ape like face seemed to snicker as if evil could find humor in anything. His mouth never opened, but I still heard it invading my mind, forcing its way in.
The voice that spoke in my head was nightmarish, it rasped, guttural noises that I could barely distinguish as syllables, that turned into words as if being instantly translated by some greater consciousness. “Youuu haavvveee beeennnn jjjjuudgged! I aaammm iiinnn ccchhhhaaarrrgggee oooffff yyyyooouuuurrrrr tttrrraaaannnnsssssfffoooorrrrmmmaattiiiooonnn. Nnnoooowwwww kkknnnnneeeellll bbbeeefffooorrreeee yyyyyoooouuuurrrr ttttrrruuueeee goooooddddd”!
Hearing this guttural voice speak with such fluidity and intelligence put me in a state of shock, and my legs were being compelled to bend into a kneel, and looking at the beautiful regal man before me I wanted to. Then the transformation took hold and it wasn’t the man but the monster and my half bent knees straightened knowing that if the simian creature was evil, this thing on the throne was the epitome of sin, and all that is wrong with everything.
“Knnneeeelllll”! Waves of white hot heat flowed over my body in shockwaves, my skin blistered and popped, forcing me to scream for the 1st time since my wings had been destroyed. I felt my eyes begin to melt again, and could feel the skin all over begin to drip like wax from a too long lit candle. The pain was immense and without thinking of the repercussions I knelt, immediately feeling the pain subside. The itching sensation of healing began, and when the roars begin I knew I had made the wrong decision.
The immensely evil balor picked me up throwing me over his shoulder, his hands burned deep into my skin, and from his shoulder I could smell the breath that reminded me of ash and hot coals. He was not gentle with the way he carried me, banging me into walls, and hitting my head on underpasses that moved to accommodate his enormous girth, then suddenly snapped back into place jolting me in the upraised head.
We twisted and turned and everywhere I looked it was as if hell was on vacation, all the inhabitants were standing on the two sides of this cavernous road we were traveling on, it was like some kind of macabre parade, but we were the only exhibit.
Strangely I realized that escape had never crossed into my mind and I knew that the thing carrying me had read this thought, this time there was no mistaking it, he outright laughed. If wheezing billowy eruptions from an apelike creature that stood 9 feet tall could be called laughter.
“Where are we going? I dared to speak, what is it that you are going to do with me”?
My jailor responded again without speaking, but his voice vocalized inside of my head, “Too bbee ttrraannssffoorrmmed”.
Another queer thing, this things speaking seemed to be improving.
“Transformed? Into what”? No answer went off in my head. “Answer me you son of a bitch”!
With that he slammed me into the ground, I felt my spine shatter, skull fracture, and many other bones in my physiology I couldn’t identify break. His maw moved to within inches of my face, and he spoke, it was the same voice, guttural and disturbing, only it seemed that much more human, “Never speaaakk ooff ttthhinngss you kkknnnoooww noootthhhiing aaabbout. Tthis iiisss yyoouur fffiinnal wwaarning”!
Groaning on the ground, he moved his hand into his pocket and pulled out a rod, one with angels wings on it, much like the ones they had removed and cauterized from my body. He waved it over my broken body and immediately I felt tissue and bone mend and heal, moments later it was if nothing had even happened to me.
“What the hell”? Questioningly and cautiously I looked up at the demon that had destroyed my body then somehow healed it.
The voice vocalizing in my head again, “Nnoot heellll, iii toookkkk ttthhhhaaattt ooooffff ttthhheee llllaassssttt aaannnggeeelll I killleeeddd”! The pleasure I heard in my head, made me unsteady, and with all that I had been through I swayed on my feet for a few seconds and passed out.
Awakening in and out of consciousness, the halls seemed to be growing darker and the only light source was free floating fire every 15 yards or so. The heat in this hallway was immense, and it forced my eyes to squint. Looking up I saw that my transportation was smiling a toothy grin and I found myself believing we were headed towards this denizens abyssal home.
Once again he could read every thought that I had, “YYeesss I llivvveee heerrreee…..bbbuuutttt wwweeee aaarrreee gggoooinnnggg tttooo aannoootthheerrr ppplllaaacccee…a pplllaaccceee oooffff ccchhhaaannnngggeee”.
How accustomed I had become to a voice speaking in my head, yet it felt as if I was constantly being raped, and assaulted mentally in this place, I could feel the residue of his evil probing on my brain. It was like muddy water being in your mouth, the water was clearly there, but you could still feel the dirty texture of objects floating inside.
A large oval shaped steel door appeared ahead, its onyx coloration gave it a shape shifting appearance from the flickering of the floating fire; However the closer I got to the door, the more it seemed to actually be moving, there was strangely no handle to push on, nor did there seem to be any type of a lock.
The demon gently lowered me to the ground and placed both his hands against the door, the warmth from his hands seemed to soak into what 1st had appeared to be steel, was a dark oak. His fiery hands seemed to heat the door and the dark coloration begins to glow. When enough heat had been absorbed eyes shot open from inside of the door, they were cold calculating eyes and glowed with an orange hue, one that bordered on the sun’s radiance. Then a mouth appeared. It spoke with a wizened accent, one learned over an ancient amount of time. “Is it time again? It has only been a few centuries”.
My demon captor looked at the eyes and spoke to him, although nothing was said out loud, it was certain there was a confrontational battle of wills, and it seemed that my captor was not all powerful as I had come to believe. Sweat flowed down his muscular body, his muscles twitched with strain, and his eyes were straining to maintain locked visage with the door.
“You will upset the balance! The door screamed, it is too soon, think of what you are doing (demons name) even your evil soul knows this is not right”. The strain in the voice was that of one about to be defeated who was changing tactics to begging.
(demons name) I had heard that somewhere before, I knew him somehow, we had a past, but my memories were in heaven where I had left them. Left them when I was stripped of all that made me human, when I was being accepted into heaven. I knew then that I was not allowed in because of the hate and the evil feeling I had brought with me. By fighting to hold onto those shark eyes that murdered me I had damned myself.
(demons name) said aloud with perfect clarity, “It’s not my decision, it is my masters bidding, and you know (doors name) that not even I can ignore those orders”.
His accent was surely (Islamic, Persian, or Egyptian whichever character I choose from the bible), I have never heard either, but instinct told me I was right. Something about the confidence in his voice made me feel like he was someone important from his time, and I knew he definitely was ancient. For the 1st time I noticed that he was not speaking English, nor was the door, the dialect and language was something I didn’t understand, yet I could speak it fluently and understand it as well.
(demons name) pushed his hands against the door, fire leapt from his hands, it was wrapped all about him, then it shot into the door, I could hear the door screaming and knew that it was being forced open. I knew all of this had something consequentially bad to do with me and I jumped up from my seated position and ran!
Pumping my legs and arms I began to run as hard and as fast as I could, only the hallway in which I was running like so many other things in this place seemed to come alive, it elongated, preventing me from ever really getting anywhere. My mind erupted into panic, the noose was still hanging from my neck and the rope was still dangling back where I had started…..
The pain was only for an instant, the rope was pulled tight, and my neck was snapped into two. The feeling in my legs and arms was gone and I knew I had been paralyzed. I heard a thump as disorientation took hold and I knew the thump had been me hitting the ground. My face was buried in the chilly heat of the cobblestone floor; even the floors in this god forsaken place were hot enough to burn your face.
I did feel the hand close around the back of my neck, it wrapped easily all the way around and my eyes registered the rise in the air as (demons name) picked me up and slung me roughly over his shoulder again.
A mental barrage assaulted my being, and even though I couldn’t feel my body, pain erupted inside of my brain; my screams tore throughout the hallway and my eyes saw that we had passed beyond the door that (demons name) had battled earlier.
I could already feel my body healing, although it would take some time without the healing powers from the wondrous rod at my demon jailors belt.
His mouth curled into another hideous smile, I knew he was reading my mind again. We both knew he didn’t have to tell me that he had no intentions of healing me again. He bellowed with that awful laughter at this thought, and gave me a mental image of an altar, with demons all around it, and I was tied to it. All sorts of creatures were closing in around me and no matter what I did I couldn’t escape. Somewhere in the crowd the beautiful man was laughing, only it kept getting closer and closer until he was on me, hands caressing my face telling me he loves me and that I was his chosen one.
Fear sent waves throughout my body and I realized that I could feel my toes numb, but I could feel them. I looked up at (demons name) and tried to peer through to see his real image, the one that was hidden, or the one that was real, I hadn’t decided yet. All I saw in return was a aura of blackness that seemed to shield him from my strange talent. Again he laughed, knowing that my feeble attempts at rebellion were futile. For the 1st time since I arrived in this hell, I too felt like all that I did or could do was futile. My will was broken and the worst was still to come.
At this thought (demons name) spoke again out loud, “Yyyessss ttthhheee wooorrrssstt isss sttillll aahheeaaddd”. His voice and statement sent a shiver down my now mending spine, and for a moment I wished that it would have just stayed broken. With this thought (demons name) erupted with laughter, and once again began our walk to where I knew my fate was going to be decided.
My eyes moved back to the boy/demon sitting on the throne of ivory or fire, the two kept changing so rapidly that I could not differentiate between which was real….or were they both real? The beautiful mouth smiled like the Cheshire cat in Alice in Wonderland, yet the demonish snout curled into a smile, one that mimicked a lion before the feeding.
His eyes never changed, they were the one constant that helped me focus to realize that both images were the truth. My heart was deafening, its pounding seemed to create a cadence that the demons flowed to, dragging me in rapid pulls, ever closer to the monstrosity that sat atop the dais at the end of the cavern.
Fire seemed to free float in this place, and magma was in deep pits everywhere, but here in this place I could not tell if they were real or my imagination, so many things seemed to be from my fantasized view of hell and I began to wonder if the demons were reading my mind.
At this realization, the noose around my neck was thrust forward by the largest of the balors. He was a deep crimson and ebon skinned monstrosity. He was easily 9 feet tall, heavy set chest, bulging arms, with scales running the lengths, above his neck sat an evil simian face, one the mocked humanity, and yet emanated intelligence. His eyes were not the passionless of my killer, but were pitch black, and I knew that this creature was pure unadulterated evil!
Of all the things I had seen here this creature was the first to cause my bowels to revolt, I felt the warmth of urine flowing down my leg, for the 1st time in my life or afterlife, I knew what fear was, and I knew I didn’t want this thing to speak.
His ape like face seemed to snicker as if evil could find humor in anything. His mouth never opened, but I still heard it invading my mind, forcing its way in.
The voice that spoke in my head was nightmarish, it rasped, guttural noises that I could barely distinguish as syllables, that turned into words as if being instantly translated by some greater consciousness. “Youuu haavvveee beeennnn jjjjuudgged! I aaammm iiinnn ccchhhhaaarrrgggee oooffff yyyyooouuuurrrrr tttrrraaaannnnsssssfffoooorrrrmmmaattiiiooonnn. Nnnoooowwwww kkknnnnneeeellll bbbeeefffooorrreeee yyyyyoooouuuurrrr ttttrrruuueeee goooooddddd”!
Hearing this guttural voice speak with such fluidity and intelligence put me in a state of shock, and my legs were being compelled to bend into a kneel, and looking at the beautiful regal man before me I wanted to. Then the transformation took hold and it wasn’t the man but the monster and my half bent knees straightened knowing that if the simian creature was evil, this thing on the throne was the epitome of sin, and all that is wrong with everything.
“Knnneeeelllll”! Waves of white hot heat flowed over my body in shockwaves, my skin blistered and popped, forcing me to scream for the 1st time since my wings had been destroyed. I felt my eyes begin to melt again, and could feel the skin all over begin to drip like wax from a too long lit candle. The pain was immense and without thinking of the repercussions I knelt, immediately feeling the pain subside. The itching sensation of healing began, and when the roars begin I knew I had made the wrong decision.
The immensely evil balor picked me up throwing me over his shoulder, his hands burned deep into my skin, and from his shoulder I could smell the breath that reminded me of ash and hot coals. He was not gentle with the way he carried me, banging me into walls, and hitting my head on underpasses that moved to accommodate his enormous girth, then suddenly snapped back into place jolting me in the upraised head.
We twisted and turned and everywhere I looked it was as if hell was on vacation, all the inhabitants were standing on the two sides of this cavernous road we were traveling on, it was like some kind of macabre parade, but we were the only exhibit.
Strangely I realized that escape had never crossed into my mind and I knew that the thing carrying me had read this thought, this time there was no mistaking it, he outright laughed. If wheezing billowy eruptions from an apelike creature that stood 9 feet tall could be called laughter.
“Where are we going? I dared to speak, what is it that you are going to do with me”?
My jailor responded again without speaking, but his voice vocalized inside of my head, “Too bbee ttrraannssffoorrmmed”.
Another queer thing, this things speaking seemed to be improving.
“Transformed? Into what”? No answer went off in my head. “Answer me you son of a bitch”!
With that he slammed me into the ground, I felt my spine shatter, skull fracture, and many other bones in my physiology I couldn’t identify break. His maw moved to within inches of my face, and he spoke, it was the same voice, guttural and disturbing, only it seemed that much more human, “Never speaaakk ooff ttthhinngss you kkknnnoooww noootthhhiing aaabbout. Tthis iiisss yyoouur fffiinnal wwaarning”!
Groaning on the ground, he moved his hand into his pocket and pulled out a rod, one with angels wings on it, much like the ones they had removed and cauterized from my body. He waved it over my broken body and immediately I felt tissue and bone mend and heal, moments later it was if nothing had even happened to me.
“What the hell”? Questioningly and cautiously I looked up at the demon that had destroyed my body then somehow healed it.
The voice vocalizing in my head again, “Nnoot heellll, iii toookkkk ttthhhhaaattt ooooffff ttthhheee llllaassssttt aaannnggeeelll I killleeeddd”! The pleasure I heard in my head, made me unsteady, and with all that I had been through I swayed on my feet for a few seconds and passed out.
Awakening in and out of consciousness, the halls seemed to be growing darker and the only light source was free floating fire every 15 yards or so. The heat in this hallway was immense, and it forced my eyes to squint. Looking up I saw that my transportation was smiling a toothy grin and I found myself believing we were headed towards this denizens abyssal home.
Once again he could read every thought that I had, “YYeesss I llivvveee heerrreee…..bbbuuutttt wwweeee aaarrreee gggoooinnnggg tttooo aannoootthheerrr ppplllaaacccee…a pplllaaccceee oooffff ccchhhaaannnngggeee”.
How accustomed I had become to a voice speaking in my head, yet it felt as if I was constantly being raped, and assaulted mentally in this place, I could feel the residue of his evil probing on my brain. It was like muddy water being in your mouth, the water was clearly there, but you could still feel the dirty texture of objects floating inside.
A large oval shaped steel door appeared ahead, its onyx coloration gave it a shape shifting appearance from the flickering of the floating fire; However the closer I got to the door, the more it seemed to actually be moving, there was strangely no handle to push on, nor did there seem to be any type of a lock.
The demon gently lowered me to the ground and placed both his hands against the door, the warmth from his hands seemed to soak into what 1st had appeared to be steel, was a dark oak. His fiery hands seemed to heat the door and the dark coloration begins to glow. When enough heat had been absorbed eyes shot open from inside of the door, they were cold calculating eyes and glowed with an orange hue, one that bordered on the sun’s radiance. Then a mouth appeared. It spoke with a wizened accent, one learned over an ancient amount of time. “Is it time again? It has only been a few centuries”.
My demon captor looked at the eyes and spoke to him, although nothing was said out loud, it was certain there was a confrontational battle of wills, and it seemed that my captor was not all powerful as I had come to believe. Sweat flowed down his muscular body, his muscles twitched with strain, and his eyes were straining to maintain locked visage with the door.
“You will upset the balance! The door screamed, it is too soon, think of what you are doing (demons name) even your evil soul knows this is not right”. The strain in the voice was that of one about to be defeated who was changing tactics to begging.
(demons name) I had heard that somewhere before, I knew him somehow, we had a past, but my memories were in heaven where I had left them. Left them when I was stripped of all that made me human, when I was being accepted into heaven. I knew then that I was not allowed in because of the hate and the evil feeling I had brought with me. By fighting to hold onto those shark eyes that murdered me I had damned myself.
(demons name) said aloud with perfect clarity, “It’s not my decision, it is my masters bidding, and you know (doors name) that not even I can ignore those orders”.
His accent was surely (Islamic, Persian, or Egyptian whichever character I choose from the bible), I have never heard either, but instinct told me I was right. Something about the confidence in his voice made me feel like he was someone important from his time, and I knew he definitely was ancient. For the 1st time I noticed that he was not speaking English, nor was the door, the dialect and language was something I didn’t understand, yet I could speak it fluently and understand it as well.
(demons name) pushed his hands against the door, fire leapt from his hands, it was wrapped all about him, then it shot into the door, I could hear the door screaming and knew that it was being forced open. I knew all of this had something consequentially bad to do with me and I jumped up from my seated position and ran!
Pumping my legs and arms I began to run as hard and as fast as I could, only the hallway in which I was running like so many other things in this place seemed to come alive, it elongated, preventing me from ever really getting anywhere. My mind erupted into panic, the noose was still hanging from my neck and the rope was still dangling back where I had started…..
The pain was only for an instant, the rope was pulled tight, and my neck was snapped into two. The feeling in my legs and arms was gone and I knew I had been paralyzed. I heard a thump as disorientation took hold and I knew the thump had been me hitting the ground. My face was buried in the chilly heat of the cobblestone floor; even the floors in this god forsaken place were hot enough to burn your face.
I did feel the hand close around the back of my neck, it wrapped easily all the way around and my eyes registered the rise in the air as (demons name) picked me up and slung me roughly over his shoulder again.
A mental barrage assaulted my being, and even though I couldn’t feel my body, pain erupted inside of my brain; my screams tore throughout the hallway and my eyes saw that we had passed beyond the door that (demons name) had battled earlier.
I could already feel my body healing, although it would take some time without the healing powers from the wondrous rod at my demon jailors belt.
His mouth curled into another hideous smile, I knew he was reading my mind again. We both knew he didn’t have to tell me that he had no intentions of healing me again. He bellowed with that awful laughter at this thought, and gave me a mental image of an altar, with demons all around it, and I was tied to it. All sorts of creatures were closing in around me and no matter what I did I couldn’t escape. Somewhere in the crowd the beautiful man was laughing, only it kept getting closer and closer until he was on me, hands caressing my face telling me he loves me and that I was his chosen one.
Fear sent waves throughout my body and I realized that I could feel my toes numb, but I could feel them. I looked up at (demons name) and tried to peer through to see his real image, the one that was hidden, or the one that was real, I hadn’t decided yet. All I saw in return was a aura of blackness that seemed to shield him from my strange talent. Again he laughed, knowing that my feeble attempts at rebellion were futile. For the 1st time since I arrived in this hell, I too felt like all that I did or could do was futile. My will was broken and the worst was still to come.
At this thought (demons name) spoke again out loud, “Yyyessss ttthhheee wooorrrssstt isss sttillll aahheeaaddd”. His voice and statement sent a shiver down my now mending spine, and for a moment I wished that it would have just stayed broken. With this thought (demons name) erupted with laughter, and once again began our walk to where I knew my fate was going to be decided.
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